For years, I’ve wanted to be the kind of woman who does her hair. You see, I have curly hair that I usually do nothing with. Sometimes I put some product in it when I’m going out. Most days, I just wash it and let it air dry with nothing in it at all, because I don’t go anywhere. This has been going on for years, and I can count on my hands how many times I’ve truly felt like I had a good hair day when my hair was curly. But that’s a somewhat separate issue.
While I’ve wished that I was one of those women who actually styled their hair, I spent years just going around with hair I hated. In high school, my hair was split right down the center and extraordinarily long. In college it was usually down or in a lazy bun. When I’d go out, I’d straighten my hair and make loose waves and I felt gorgeous. But aside from those days, I was basically living life on the curly side.
When I started working full time, I became even lazier than I was in college. I went out less, aside from going to work every day. It seemed pointless to do my hair just to go to work- I wasn’t doing anything special. For the most part, I felt secure with how I looked even if that meant disliking how I looked most of the time. It just didn’t really matter THAT much to me.
Well, let’s flash forward to a few months ago. The post-partum hair loss began. The pesky knot I always got at the base of my neck suddenly became 3 times as big. In fact, my hair was starting to tangle at the roots! I sat around at home all day on maternity leave, so that whole “not doing anything special” kicked in big time. I had my hair down a day or two then it would get super tangled and I’d just toss it into a bun, making it MORE TANGLED. Wash, brush, rinse and repeat. After spending 10+ minutes brushing out my hair in the shower a few times, I was tired of it. There had to be a better way.
Despite not going anywhere, I’ve straightened my hair the last 3 months and I don’t regret it one bit. Here’s 7 reasons why I do it and how I find the time- all while taking care of a baby, a puppy, 3 cats, and trying to grow a business.
I look good, so I feel good. Me lounging in my pjs with straight hair? I consider myself a 9. Pjs and curly hair? A solid 4, maybe. Some girls really rock the curly hair look. I don’t feel like I’m one of them. Feeling good (human, I should say) is essential when you’re home all day with a baby. It’s so easy to lose yourself and say you’re “too busy” for this or that (SHOWERING) so by doing my hair, it helped to remind me that I’m still a woman, a wife, and a sexy one at that!
It prevents tangles. Although I don’t brush my hair when it’s straight (I guess that’s a curly hair habit that stuck with me) it just doesn’t tangle nearly as much. Even if I put it in a bun those last few days or sleep with it down, somehow it just doesn’t form that giant knot anymore. Hallelujah!
It really isn’t as much work as I thought to blow dry my hair. It takes about 20 minutes using the Revlon One-Step Hair Dryer and Volumizer. That’s only 10 minutes more than it was taking me just to brush my giant curly knot. And my hair ends up looking 10x better. This magic tool leaves my hair looking smooth and full of body. I talk alllll about it here.
It’s silly, but it’s important. You may be thinking that it’s pointless to style your hair when you’re home, or that you have better things to do, or you don’t have the time. And whatever you believe to be true... well you’ll convince yourself it is. I know I did, for years! I finally decided that I was going to prioritize my looks a little bit. You won’t see me in a full face of makeup anytime soon, but I can at least run a round brush through my hair to make myself feel presentable.
If you prioritize feeling good, you’ll find the time to do it. I blow dry my hair while Hailey takes her nap. If she wakes up after my shower but before I can do my hair, I’ll put her in her bouncer and pop on a Disney movie. She loves it and although I feel a little guilty sometimes, she never finishes the movie. It’s only for about 20 minutes and then I whisk her back into my arms. You can also do quiet time or activities with the kids, like having them do a puzzle. Or let them be kinda wild and play pirates or something together.
If all else fails, get your husband/partner involved. You may be thinking that your husband won’t understand why you even care about your appearance. It might be hard to justify at first, because it’ll seem so frivolous. I felt a little embarrassed the first time my husband came home and my hair was done. It seemed silly and unnecessary. But after a couple of weeks I don’t even care what he has to say. I care for Hailey all day long and this is my way of feeling sexy again. Once your partner sees how confident and sexy you feel, they’ll likely get on board with it. It’ll probably have some perks for them if you feel good too!
Maybe you’re thinking that your husband is useless with the kids, so you can’t expect him to watch them while you do your hair. Um, girlfriend, that’s even more reason to get him involved. Your husband should be your partner, and there’s no reason why he shouldn’t be able to carry his weight with the kids. Even if you’re a stay at home mom, you deserve a break. Even if he acts like he doesn’t know what to do with the kids, this is how he’ll learn. I’m 1,000% blessed to have a husband who’s probably more useful than I am when it comes to running a home, but this is how the dynamic should be in every family. We all pitch in to help, and it’s much better for your kids when their dad is happily involved in all aspects of their lives.
My motto for this year is “if not now, when?” I’m tired of living for “someday”. My entire life has been me putting off the things I truly want while waiting for me to magically be the type of person who did the things I wanted to do. You don’t magically become that person- you gotta do the things to actually… you know, do the things, and become the person. Whether it’s dressing better, being braver, being more present, or even just doing your damn hair. If you keep living for “someday” you’ll die waiting for it.